Tag: God

Categories
being relational

Relationship with God

A cafe somewhere in the UK. Photographed by myself sometime in 2024

A group of us were talking about our relationship with God and someone had heard a couple of stories from nuns who say that they are so encouraged to think of other people and other people’s needs that they forget that they have a personal relationship with God.

So does that mean we need to be self-centred to have a relationship personal relationship with God?

Well, as I’ve explored before, it does say that we are to “love our neighbour as ourselves” which, I believe, means that we can only love our neighbour as much as we can love ourselves. We can really only give to others what we can give to ourselves. I know many who would say that you see people doing good things for others who are then hard on themselves. But my question would be, firstly, why are they hard on themselves? And also wonder what their motive for being kind to others is?

For some people, and I know because I’ve been there, we are kind to others in the hope that they will like us more, will be kind back to us, others will think we are good people when deep down we know we’re not. For others, like the nuns, they have been taught to value others higher than themselves, even though this isn’t what God is saying – possibly isn’t walking in “The way, the truth and the life”

I got a great example of how we should be with God from my dog. I’d done some housework and was taking a break to finish a book I’d been reading. So I gave him a shout and said I was going up to lie on the bed and read. Well you have never seen anything so excited. He bounded up the stairs, leapt on to the bed, jumped on me when I sat down, and the curled himself up between my legs and was asleep snoring gently perfectly surrounded by me.

Now I think that is what God wants for us, for us to be excited when God says “let’s go hang out together and do nothing”. We should then be rushing to be in that place on God’s lap and then we can just let go of what is going on in our world, trust that God has it covered, whatever else God might be up to. We don’t need to talk to God, ask for things, do things. We just need to contentedly lie with God just like my little dog does with me .

As those who know my dog will know that he is at his most content when he is with me. My husband says if I go out without the dog then he’ll stand and look at the back door and he has to really encourage him to come upstairs and wait somewhere more comfy.

To have this personal relationship with God we need to remember that God doesn’t go out without us, is always there, and for a lot of the time really does just want us to snuggle close and enjoy being together.

Categories
The Jesus Way Way

I Am The Way, The Truth and The Life – Part One

Near Capel Currig, photographed by myself December 2024

I have the privilege to meet with two 15-16 year old girls in McDonalds on a regular basis to discuss things from the Bible. We’re using the Alpha guide “Why am I here?” as kick-starts to discussions.

We’re starting with the verse

Jesus said, “I am the way and the truth and the life”

John 14:6

One of the sentences in the booklet is “Jesus is the lens through which we see God” but that got me thinking “how do we see Jesus?”

If you listen to the evangelical American right then Jesus is brutal, full of rules and knows best. If you listen to those who have left organised religions then you get a very different picture. But are either “correct2?

My mum sent through a reflection from her vicar for this Sunday and in that he talks of how we need to see God in creation and also in the troubles of the world; in the good, the bad and the inbetween; to see Jesus turning water in to wine and in gifts of the Holy Spirit, which he lists as

Wisdom, Understanding, Counsel, Fortitude, Knowledge, Piety, and
the Fear of the Lord.

Jesus is found in the miraculous and the ordinary, the individual and the community.

Interestingly another verse on the first page of the Alpha booklet was

Jesus said, “I am the bread of life.”

John 6:35

And the immediate response from my girls was that Jesus is sustaining and filling.

So if we take their thoughts and other bits from our discussion then, I think, if following Jesus isn’t sustaining and filling is it really the Jesus Way? [and remember that the early followers were called “Followers of the Way” and the term Christian was used as an insult] If following Jesus doesn’t encompass the troubles and the joys of this world is it really the Jesus Way? If following Jesus can’t be done in a group and alone is it the Jesus Way?

So to me when Jesus says “I am the Way” he is talking about a life that is sustainable, filling, can be found in the troubles and the joys, and is something I love to do alone and also love to do with others. To me this is the The Way Jesus talks about here.

Categories
fire good

Use of Metaphor

Photo by moein moradi on Pexels.com

With all that is happening politically in our world many of the first posts of the year started with “World on Fire” and then large chunks of California have either been burned away or are being burned; for which reasons are being given to do with climate change but also that the undergrowth is growing faster, not being cleared and so fire fighters couldn’t get through to deal with the fires. Those fire breaks had gone.

Then yesterday I was at church and we were talking about the Baptism of Jesus and sung songs with lines like “let your fire come”, “set your church on fire”, “set our hearts on fire”.

What do we mean by these words? Do we really want that all consuming out of control fire that has raged through Los Angeles recently? Do we really want that in our streets, in our homes, in our churches?

Having heard stories from a friend who lost her house in a massive fire Ventura, California in November, which we didn’t hear about because the media was caught up in the US elections, seeing a fire race over the hills towards a home you have designed and built yourself, have untold memories as well as possessions inside and you just stand there in the clothes you have on, it is a horrid experience, and one I would not want to face. So I do wonder if that is why when we sing these songs about God sending fire we have a mental picture in our heads of something contained and safe.

Like it says in the Chronicles of Narnia when Susan asks if Aslan is safe, Mr Beaver says

“Safe? Who said anything about safe? ‘Course he isn’t safe. But he’s good.”

I wonder when we sing these songs about God’s fire coming if we really want a safe fire like the candles we burn or the fires we have in our grates at home where they give out warmth but are contained. I don’t think we really want a wild raging fire sweeping where it chooses to destroying things we hold dear in its path.

I think we are really singing songs asking God to send a calm, cleansing, controlled fire that will get rid of the bits we don’t like but we’ll be able to keep an eye on where it is going and what it is doing.

But as Mr Beaver says God isn’t safe. Good but not safe. Do we pray to a safe God rather than a Good God? Do we even believe God is good all the time?

Are we willing to let go of what we think is important and let God have free range to cleanse and destroy and change what we hold dear in our lives? Are we willing to look for a Good God?

As I sat there in that lovely Victorian building singing a song I’ve sung in many other places I know I didn’t really want something I couldn’t control raging through the routines of church, the routines of my life, the norms as I see them. Oh yes I would like to choose what gets burnt away because I think I know best, but I am suspecting my “knows best” is different to other peoples “knows best”.

So I think we need to be careful with our metaphors, careful with what we wish for, careful with what we pray. What we need to do is spend some time alone with God getting to that point of really being able to pray “Your Will Be Done” because that is a real letting go and takes us to a place of really being able to say “Ok God I trust you. Have your way in our land”. And believing, as my friend in Ventura still does, that God is a good God no matter what.

Categories
growing learning

Is Everything Really a Lesson?

Renly relaxing on Boxing Day after a big hike. Photographed by myself December 2024

Ok yes I know dogs get trained to sit, stay, wait, and random things like roll over, etc but I don’t think dogs see everything that goes on in their world as a lesson but too often I hear it from people.

I read an interesting article and when I commented on it the author of the article said he’d been waiting to share as he couldn’t work out what the lesson was. My reply to his reply was “did there have to be a lesson?”

I think too often we humans think every thing that goes on is meant to teach us something and I’m sure some things are, but really is everything?

In 2012-2013 we went through a series of untimely deaths and other random changes in our lives. Was that a lesson? If so I’m not sure what it. Or was it just “things happen and sometimes they happen at the same time”?

The more I’ve seen and done and prayed and pondered the more I think that even though not everything is a lesson per se – because God isn’t some great big teacher wanting us to pass tests all the time – I do think that I have learned things from them and have changed as a person.

It might sound like splitting hairs but I think there is a big difference between learning things and things being a lesson. I think that we can choose to learn things but if something is a lesson there is a specific “thing” to be gained from that.

Also I think if we are open to learning things then yes “every day is a school day” but also it doesn’t mean that we are waiting for a specific something to happen to learn something.

It also means that we have no fear of what the “teacher” is going to say or if we miss the point being made. There is no worrying about what that lesson was.

I home schooled my children up till they were fifteen and people used to often ask what “lessons” we did and how we worked in school holidays. Well because every moment of every day was a chance to learn something all of us, myself included, were always open to what was going on around us, always curious, always expecting something to show up. Not every moment was a lesson that came with outcomes and things that I could tell the home schooling inspector but, on the whole, we learned and changed and grew and explored things on a regular basis.

So I don’t think God is up there with a lesson plan for us but I do think they want us to be open and aware of what is going on around us. They want us to become more who we are called to be, to know and love ourselves, those around us and of course them more and more.

So not everything is a lesson but everything is an opportunity to be open to learning and growing.

Categories
Believe present

God is with me ALL the time

Sunrise Christmas morning over my park December 2025 Photographed by myself

I was led in bed the other morning thinking about praying when a thought struck me. What if I really believed God was with me all the time? How would that change my thoughts?

It took me back to those thoughts around why organised religion likes the idea of Jesus being born in a stable away from the family so that one would have to go to him to worship him. But it is probably Jesus was born in a safe warm place with family around him. Yes the shepherds and wisemen went to him but for everyone else he was just there.

What if I believed that the Creator of the Universe was just here with me as promised?

The first thought is “I would behave ‘better'” whatever ‘better’ means.

But actually if I really believed that the Creator of the Universe was fully with me it would change my thoughts. How could I not like myself if God loves me? How could I think negative thoughts about myself when God wants to be with me? How could I regret the life I have if God is here with me?

That doesn’t mean my life is perfect, or for that matter has ever been perfect. I have made loads of mistakes, doing things I wish I hadn’t, had things done to me I wish hadn’t been done, but as and when those things cross my mind I repent and forgive – forgiving myself as much as others. Releasing myself and others from any hold that our pasts might have on us [and past can be in the last 10 minutes!!]

I am now working on getting my head round fully believing that God is with me all the time not in some place I have to go to; that I can talk with them all the time because they are here with me and not is some far off place.

I need to be aware of what I think and feel about myself then that good energy can go outwards and onward to others. Remembering always that we can only love others as we love ourselves, only forgive others as we forgive ourselves. And all this is possible because the Creator of the Universe is not just walking with us but is in bed with us, watching TV with us, eating with us, going to work with us, going for a walk with us, and even going to church with us. This not because they are some creepy voyeur but because they love us so much they cannot bear to be apart from us because we are AWESOME just as we are.

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christmas faith Mary

Faith and Action

Cute picture of my dog and cat being inactive – photographed by myself Dec 2024

James says “faith without works is dead” [James 2:26]

After yesterday’s Upper Room gathering and rehearsing with the young people for the Nativity play, I realised God works this way too – sharing deeds to help our faith. Probably if one looks properly all those things we say the Bible says God wants us to do God’s doing them anyway.

In the Upper Room we got into talking about ways we had really seen God show up – a nurse suddenly appearing to suggest a treatment which saved a dying mother, a head on crash being diverted by the car suddenly being in a lay-by, a vision of a car which slowed the driver down and stopped her being hit, etc, etc, etc. We all had some story or another. But I also wonder how many more things had happen to us that were God’s intervention but we didn’t see because we weren’t being observant enough?

When we are fully present in the moment we see the things God has for us, I believe. Then instead of worrying about our circumstances we can be in that place of openness, observation and deep joy. But we do need to be in that place.

With the QEC work I do our practitioner talks a lot about keeping one’s autonomic nervous system in a place of calm which we learn to do by saying things like “I’m safe, your safe, we’re safe” or “my ANS in a calm and stasis” or for me spending time free writing and letting my heart seep out of my pen then adding in some different beliefs.

So where am I going with this? Well for me I like QEC because not only do I see it work in myself but I see it working with my practitioner. She isn’t just talking the talk she’s walking the walk. [Faith and deeds]

The reason I like God [and struggle with much of organised religions] is that I see things that align with what is being talked. Like with the stories from the Upper Room community – God in action.

So back to the Christmas story. The other day I said that people believed Mary because they had faith and trust in her; that she was the only human who really knew how she got pregnant. But actually if one reads the Christmas story then there is more to it than that.

Firstly we have to let go of all we have been preached and also all of modern life. Jewish communities did NOT have a stable on the edge of town where Jesus would be born away from prying eyes. He would have been born in the town. Even if there were people who did not believe Mary’s story about how she got pregnant they would still have taken her and Joseph into their home because there was no where else to go.

Jesus was born into a home not away from everyone though much of what we hear preached and are encouraged to believe now is that Jesus was born on the outside. As I read recently [but have lost where] religion, and so ourselves, likes the idea of Jesus being born in a stable on the edge of town where we can go and visit him rather than being in our homes where we are stuck with him all the time.

Next angels appear to shepherds. It says “the brightness of the Lord’s glory flashed around them” [Luke 2:9 CEV] So you’ve got shepherds on a hill above the town. Close enough to run into the town to see the baby. It wasn’t like we are now with light pollution and whatever. The place was in pitch darkness so even a small fire would be seen for miles and miles. Suddenly, up on a hill, there is light. Someone in the town would have seen it.

Then these shepherds hurry down from the hill to see Jesus. It doesn’t say they wait till daylight. So they’ve got torches and all sorts and I suspect they weren’t being quiet.

Also remember now we’ve got Mary, Joseph and Jesus in someone’s house not in a stable on the edge of town. I’m suspecting those shepherds didn’t get the right house the first time. I suspect they knocked on a few doors before they found the right one. But also I am suspecting because of the light and noise of the angels that people in the town were up.

This was no secret on the edge of town birth. This was big. This was noticeable.

God asked for faith and then gave deeds to help with that faith.

As I’ve pondered it this year I would love to think of Joseph and all his relatives in Bethlehem thinking that they would love to believe Mary because she is such a sweet person and so reliable and trustworthy, but then God comes along and does the deeds thing and they go from that small seed of faith to that tree of full blown belief.

Maybe too it is how those of us who accepted Jesus by faith have been able to hanging in there during the tough times because God gave us something more tangible too?

Faith without deeds is dead – and because God knows our fragile hearts they are able to give us deeds to help us with our faith.

Peaceful Christmas to everyone who reads this. And keep your eyes wide open to see what really is going on around you.

My hallway with and without extra lights – December 2024

Categories
faith trust

Mary

Photo by Bich Tran on Pexels.com

I love working with children because they come with no presumptions about anything and are willing to listen and learn, but through explaining to them something we adults have known for ages I get a new perspective.

I’ve written a version of the Nativity story for the Christingle service for the church where I co-run the youth group because the young people who read the Bible verses last year wanted to act it out this year. It is bonkers and crazy and like herding cats but way more fun.

Anyway I was trying to get some method acting into it and was telling the 10 year old girl who was playing Mary why she was scared to tell Joseph she was pregnant – the whole thing about being stoned to death if he didn’t believe her [yes I’m a no holes barred youth worker :)] .

What struck me as I was telling her was that actually Mary, if we take what we are told in the Bible, is the only human being who knows how she got pregnant. The Bible doesn’t mention anyone else there or anyone overhearing. From that point onward the main characters in the Jesus story believe what Mary says to them but none of them know for sure.

Over the years there have been many preachers who have filled in the gaps, said how people “knew for sure” but all of it fits in with the last two blog posts around not knowing for sure what people are thinking, etc – of mind-reading, fortune-telling, presuming.

But also it talks of trust and faith. Mary knows what happened. Joseph trusts her and the dream he has. Luke, the only one of the gospel writers who mentions the virgin birth, obviously trusts whoever told him or believes it by faith as do then many the people who read it from then onward

.[There are also many people who choose not to believe and that is something I might pursue in another post? Maybe!]

How often have you trusted what someone has said because they are trustworthy? Even things like when you make an arrangement to see someone both of you are trusting that the other people will turn up. You trust them because when they have said they are going to be somewhere at a certain time they do. We all also have people that we have learned not to trust because what they say they often don’t mean. And of course we need to take captive those thoughts when we try to mind-read as to why they are like they are. Sometimes we just have to say we don’t believe what they say but not turn them into monsters.

I think Mary must have been a very trustworthy person for Joseph and others to believe what she says. Try to forget all the icon images we have of her as something special. She was just an ordinary teenage girl – though with an extraordinary trust in God – but she wasn’t any more holy than you and I.

Who do you trust when they tell you something extraordinary and why?

Categories
bonfire Captive

Take Every Thought Captive

Image from https://hgc.org.my/sermons/take-every-thought-captive/

It’s been a while since I’ve posted . Not because I haven’t had posts in my head but because it is that time of year – that time when one’s head if filled with Christmas stuff; what to get for who and when to send, and what Christmas cards to send to who and why, the whole food and drink thing, and what to do with the long enforced break for some. Head full of thoughts. I’ve also decided to start a Substack with my writing on it which I’ve told people I’ll post 2-3 times a week. I’ve done one week and got a growing following, including one paying subscriber so I probably need to do regular postings. Perhaps should have waited till the new year but ….

This post came from a picture on FB about taking thoughts captive, which I cannnot refind so can’t share the source of this thought with you but did find the lovely picture above. I’ve not read the post/sermon that accompanies it but do feel free if you wish.

Here is the whole Bible verse

We demolish arguments and every pretension …, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

2 Corinthians 10:5

How often do arguments occur because we have let our minds wander off on their own coming up with all sorts of scenarios for what the other person is thinking/feeling/intentions are? I’ve had it with the Christmas present shopping. Once I’ve bought something I go down the rabbit hole of “they won’t like it” “it is too much” “I should have bought X instead”.

I had a lovely challenge over the weekend. A friend had message to say she was off to the park and would meet me there. She was late and I’d bumped into another friend who’d suggested going to see the waves [it was the tail end of Storm Darragh]. Whilst I was on the beach with this friend the other friend phoned to say she was at the park. I told her where I was. It is a walk that leads back to the park but when I got back and phoned her she didn’t answer. I then messaged to say did she want to meet for coffee the following day. No answer. So my mind started its journey of “she doesn’t like me any more” “she’s scary when she’s angry” right the way through to “I’m not sure if I want to be her friend any more”. I then pulled myself together and started taking every one of those random thoughts captive. Because I like visual stuff I imagined these thoughts running like fish along the river of my mind [I think I’ve heard this in a sermon somewhere] and I speared them, gave them a quick look over, then throw them on to a bonfire. Eventually those random thoughts stopped coming and I was at peace with my decision to go to the beach instead of hanging around in the park and felt that all would work out as God/The Universe intended. The following day I got a text from her saying she wasn’t free when I’d said but what about later in the week. When we did meet she didn’t say anything about me going to the beach. It was all over.

How often though do we waste time on those random thoughts? How often do we take things and blow them up out of all proportion?

I could easily have built up arguments in my head about this friendship, built up pretensions. In a course I did about relieving stress this was called “fortune telling” – imagining a future when none of us know what the future looks like. Although this does seem to be what our media and much of social media focuses on – fear of what might happen. Capture those thoughts and throw them away. None of us knows the future. And we build up stress and stress leads of falling out with each other because we aren’t living in the reality that is now.

A couple of nights later I’d had too much sugar before going to bed and woke up with that whole worrying about X,Y and Z. I did the “taking every thought captive” and throwing it on the bonfire and as I did it I cleared the water of my mind, realised that it was a sugar rush going on, went to get a drink and accepted that this was what it was. I didn’t even do the “I shouldn’t have done eaten those sweets so close to bed”. Instead I just accepted that what was was.

I’m learning more and more to do this with other things. So with the presents and the Christmas cards I’ve written, I’m sending with love and a belief that they will be received with love. Because also all thoughts are not to be thrown on to the bonfire and got rid of. Some thoughts are lovely and need to be savoured. That is why it says to capture them but then make them obedient to the mind of Christ which is calm, peaceful, and filled with love.

River at Betws-y-coed September 2023 photographed by myself

Categories
breathing influence

Inspiration

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

The other day I learned that original meaning of the word “Inspiration” was defined as the “immediate influence of God” and the idea was closely linked to writing (rather than other art-forms) as it described how those who wrote holy books were influenced by a higher power to do so – according to the lovely Grace of Wordfoolery.

She goes on to say about how it comes from Old French and Latin to blow into or breathe upon, and figuratively to excite or inspire somebody.

She does say more about how it came into its modern usage but you can read that. What inspired me was this whole thing of this immediate influence of God, especially to writing, and this whole breathing upon or blowing into.

I just love the idea of God blowing on to my writing – whether it is these random ponderings on here or the stories, etc I write. For me God inspired writing does not have to just biblical based or mentioning God. Or even things like CS Lewis or Tolkien allegories. I think God inspired writing can be anything and for me this definition of the word “inspiration” means God can breath into or blow upon anything whether I, or other writers, acknowledge their influence.

I often do some breathing exercises before I write because it helps me focus, but I think now I might do some with intention to get some of that “immediate influence of God”.

Categories
climate change unconditional love

Storms, Storms and More Storms

This is what has been going on in my house over this weekend as Wales get battered by Storm Darragh.

Compared to many places across the globe the UK gets off lightly with extremes of weather. Oh we get weather and don’t we Brits like to talk about it. Even if you have nothing to say to anyone as you pass in the street you can always say things like “nice day” “bit cloudy/windy/rainy/sunny” “bit cold/hot/wet/dry” “its come early for winter/spring/summer/autumn” Always a something and generally a disgruntled something.

Well for the first time I think we’ve had a red weather warning. Our local Victorian pier is breaking up with the battering it is getting. Trees are coming down. Roads are blocked. Electricity is down. Christmas markets are cancelled and we’ll all be late doing our Christmas shopping!!!

But it isn’t like some places even in America where twisters and floodings and fires are becoming a thing. I was amazed at the lack of news about the fire in Ventura, California, which happened during the US elections. I only knew about it because one of the houses destroyed belonged to friends. I wonder how many other environmental disasters there are that we never hear about?

Yes environmental disasters! Because that is what this extreme weather is – an environmental disaster brought on by climate change.

I would say this isn’t normal but I think it is going to become the new normal. But also it is to be expected.

6 You will hear of wars and rumors of wars, but see to it that you are not alarmed. Such things must happen, but the end is still to come. 7 Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be famines and earthquakes in various places. 8 All these are the beginning of birth pains.

9 “Then you will be handed over to be persecuted and put to death, and you will be hated by all nations because of me. 10 At that time many will turn away from the faith and will betray and hate each other, 11 and many false prophets will appear and deceive many people. 12 Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold, 13 but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved.

Matthew 26:6-13

Ok so it doesn’t mention floods and uncontrolled fires and extremes of weather, etc, but that sort of thing does appear in poetic form in the Book of Revelations later in the Bible. Worth a read as you look at these global weather phenomenons.

I’ve been doing some pondering around being a Christian, Jesus, and the whole suffering thing – encouraged by a friend last night as we were driving home. She was saying about trusting God in the storm [we were driving back from a concert as Storm Darragh was approaching North Wales] but I was then saying how many Christian friends or friends of friends I’d known who’d died in car accidents, etc. They died. We suffered grief. God didn’t stop it from happening.

Interestingly in the above verses it doesn’t say God will stop it from happening. In fact it says these things MUST happen. Too often, especially the evangelical charismatic branch of Christianity, has said God will stop us suffering. But this isn’t what Jesus says to his followers just before he dies and before the authorities turn against his followers. He says that it is only the one who stands firm who will survive.

Now I don’t think that means that we won’t get hurt, battered, lose things and people important to us. I think it means that we must stand strong in the faith that the Creator of the Universe and the one who is allowing all this chaos because they knew why loves us all unconditionally and will give us the peace and joy that transcends all understanding.

So I am grateful that I have a lovely warm solid house to be sheltered in, that we have lots of food, that we live in a town and so don’t have to get the car out, but above and beyond all that I am grateful that The Creator of The Universe loves not just me but all my family, friends, acquaintances, and even people I don’t like and don’t know, unconditionally.

[Though of course my very human side also wishes that we could have a weekend where we didn’t have to worry about the weather and could just go for a nice long walk and lunch out!!! 🙂 ]