Categories
endurance hope

Suffering is good for us

Beauty of a dead tree. Isle of Wight. August 2024. Photographed by myself

… suffering produces endurance,  and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, …

Romans 5:3-4

Yet in the world we live in we take pills, whether prescribed or self-medicated, whether alcohol or drugs, whether taken in moderation or to excess, or buying stuff, watching TV, to elevate our suffering rather than acknowledging that we suffer.

I wrote a piece a while back about acknowledging grief rather than just trying to make it go away and really grief is a form of suffering, but there are loads of other things that cause us to suffer which lead to anxiety and depression, to various illnesses [Read The Body Keeps The Score and other books by Gabor Mate and others like him]

Who of us does not want to be able to endure, to be of a character people admire, to have hope that we can pass on? Yet too often we don’t want to go through the suffering to get there so we fill our lives with stuff, etc.

The Bible also says “Blessed are those who mourn” [Matthew 5:4] which means those who mourn are comforted by God, if they are willing to acknowledge their need. Suffering and pain teach us things, help us in getting closer to ourselves and to God/something beyond ourselves; help us acknowledge our true selves.

A wise person said “there is no hope without the acknowledgment of suffering” and “a denial of suffering is a denial of hope” and yet too often we try to deny our suffering behind so many things.

I was writing a short piece about an older couple I knew many years ago. They had been through a lot – she had lost a lung through TB and told she couldn’t have children, and also they were very involved in CND [the Campaign for Nuclear Disarmament] and had been on the original CND marches Aldermaston back in 1958 when fear about the world being destroyed by nuclear war was high. Yet they chose to have children – one of which was my boyfriend for a couple of years – and chose to have hope and to be involved in the lives of others. They very much acknowledged their own suffering and the suffering and pain of the world yet were so full of hope people were drawn to them.

A leprosy doctor [can’t remember the article but do remember what was said] said that from what he see we treat pain as an illness rather than the symptom of the illness. So we treat the pain, the outwards signs, but we do not name and treat the actual problem.

If the above bible verse is true then won’t it happen that the more we treat suffering rather than acknowledge it, surely slowly but surely we will lose endurance, will not gain a depth of character others want to emulate, and so will lose sight of hope?

If we need suffering to have hope then let us be willing to be open about our suffering, name it for what it is, and so grow in endurance and character so we can be a hope to the world!

Categories
may day prayer

May Day

Renly says “Happy May Day” with a glass of isle of Bute gin. Photograph taken May 2023 by myself

The sun is shining here in North Wales and it was shining last May on the Isle of Bute where we holiday this time last year. The sun is really welcoming in the season and the weather feels different. We are again about to go on holiday [so no blogs for abut 10 days]. This year we’re off to the North Yorkshire coast, to a place I’ve wanted to visit for a couple of years. Not the area but the cottage – hot tub, gin bar, 2 mins walk to the beach, properly dog friendly. I’m hoping it is as wonderful as my expectations.

I’m not sure about you but a new month always comes with expectations to me. I love to turn over the calendar, see what the picture is, see what we’ve got planned. After 20+ days the current month starts to look jaded. I’ve read what we’re doing enough by then. Many events have passed. But now we are on a new month with the first week of it taken up with holiday!

But I wonder what happens when we don’t have things to look forward to, when we don’t have expectation about some planned event.

Where there is no vision, the people perish…

Proverbs 29:18

Proverbs tells us that without a vision, without a hope for the future, people perish or cast off restraint, which can mean they just go their own way, get caught up in things that will take their minds off where they are now – drugs, alcohol, binge watching, mental health issues, etc. And I am sure it is what leads to greed, wars, fear, hatred.

As I look forward to my holiday I think about those migrants whose fears for themselves and their families outstrip even their desire to stay in their homeland. All I can do is pray for them, realise that not everyone is as privileged as I am, but also not allow myself to get drag down into that place of no hope. If I don’t have hope for a better future when I go on holiday all I am doing is escaping – like the person who gets wasted on drugs or alcohol.

Strange as it sounds, I believe, that if I can hold that juxtapose position of praying for migrants, for those who don’t have, etc, along with enjoying my holiday, my life, the sunshine, then I can be of more good to the world around me, have a more sustained prayer life than if I was either miserable and depressed about the world or totally pollyannaish about it all or escapist.

So as the sun shines, as I pack for my holiday, I hold those who don’t and can’t do this up in prayer to God. And I have found the most wonderful thing is that if I am truly trusting God then I can give this stuff I am led to pray about to God knowing that God will do what God knows best to do – day after day after day.